Boxes of My Mind

Jesus gave me emotions to feel pleasure and pain.
So why do I lock them in BOXES…given no name?
Boxes…buried so deep that I can’t find
Those hidden chambers in the depth of my mind.

Not even I know what’s in my innermost part,
Or can discover what lies deep in my heart.
I can’t look there…for if I should see
There would be things I can’t accept…about me.

But Jesus accepts me…and to each box holds the key.
With my permission He will empty them, setting me free.
But I protect “self” and to me…tightly hold.
If I yield to Him, I’ll be out of control.

Then cam His question, ‘Who do you love most, Me or your sin?
If I’m you choice…then you must let me in”
Then gently He showed me the names…now so clear,
And the boxes, once hidden, began to appear.

The name of the first box was…Pride.
I had kept it hidden so well because of the “junk” inside.
Judging, condemning others…while promoting me.
I just couldn’t be like that. How could it be?

The label on the next box was…Fears.
The contents are insecurities, rejections and tears.
But I stuffed and packed that one so well
That no one by looking at all could tell.

Boxes, so many boxes, holding memories from long ago.
Hurt feelings I nurtured and wouldn’t let go.
Some boxes I saved just to make me feel good,
When the world treated me unjustly, as I knew it would.

But Jesus, You knew me before I was formed.
You chose me and loved me and now I’m reborn.
So please empty the boxes, I’m willing but don’t know what to do.
And Lord, when they are empty, please fill them with You.

I lay my life down before You as I open the book
And together we face it and You help me look.
As we walk through the pages of disappointments and pain
You cleanse me and bathe me, in Your gentle rain.

Now the pain is gone and in its place comes Your Peace
For You take those things as far away as west is from east.
No longer do I have to feel the guilt and the shame.
All that is left in my boxes are ashes, sweet smelling ashes, in
Your Holy Flame.

You have given me knowledge and the tools it will take.
They are called choices, “contrary choices” that I must make.
When negative thoughts creep in, now I know I have the choice
Not to follow them with actions…or give them a voice.

Neither to stuff them in a box entrenched in my soul
But to express them to You, then release them, making me whole.
Emotions aren’t sin! Jesus, You must have felt just like we do.
But You chose to be obedient and act as the Father told you to.

I choose too, to be transformed by the Light, not bound to sin.
I don’t have to fill my boxes with “junk” …ever again.
Now You can fill the empty space Lord, but each day I must ask,
Please fill me with Your Love, equipping me for the task.

Of helping others see their boxes they have hidden away
Showing them how they may be emptied, Your Perfect Way.
Having Your Mind in place of my own is the Good News!
By submitting to YOU…we are truly free to choose.

by Vicki Eaton